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Showing posts with the label Relationships

Quit Pro Quo

  Click here to listen to today’s devotional 2 Corinthians 12:14-18 “You scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours" sounds friendly enough. Helpful, even. You do something for me, and I’ll return the favor. There’s even a familiar Latin phrase for it: quid pro quo. This for that. But if we’re not careful, “this for that” can become the math we use for relationships. I helped you, so you should help me. I showed up for you, so you should show up for me. I gave, so eventually you should give something back. Paul wants nothing to do with that kind of relationship with the Corinthians. In 2 Corinthians 12, he tells them, “I do not want what is yours but you.” Then he uses the parent-child relationship as an example. “Children ought not to lay up for their parents, but parents for their children.” Paul’s not saying children never give anything to their parents. He's describing the direction of mature love. Mature love asks, “What can I give?” before it asks, “What am I getting?” Tha...

Winning Like Jesus

  1 Corinthians 6:1-8 We like to win. because winning feels good. Apparently, the Christians in Corinth thought so too. In 1 Corinthians 6, Paul addresses church members taking one another to court. In the Roman world, lawsuits could involve more than settling a disagreement. Courts operated within a culture shaped by wealth, social status, and honor. The goal wasn't necessarily to find out who was right or wrong. Taking someone to court could be another way to show who had power and who didn’t. Scholars note that many of the conflicts in 1 Corinthians revolve around these kinds of divisions and expectations of social privilege. And Paul tells the Corinthian Christians to stop. But then he says something even more uncomfortable: “Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be defrauded?” Now, I don't think Paul is suggesting that injustice is okay. He's asking whether getting what we think we're owed has become more important than becoming like Jesus. How does that questi...

The God Hug

  Genesis 33:4-11 Click here to listen to today’s devotional Jacob saw Esau coming. This scene should begin with an ominous soundtrack. For years, Jacob probably thought about the day he deceived his brother, stole his blessing, and ran away because he was afraid of the consequences. Now, after all that time, Esau was coming toward Jacob with 400 men. And Jacob prepared for the worst. Wouldn't you? But Genesis 33 tells a different story. One of my favorites, actually. The text says that when Esau saw Jacob, he ran to meet him, embraced him, threw his arms around his neck, and kissed him. Jacob saw Esau and expected a fight. Esau saw Jacob and saw his little brother. We're not told how or why Esau changed his mind about what he wanted to do to Jacob all those years ago. But he offers me great hope for what our relationships with each other and with God can be. We're good at carrying our failures and our regrets around. So many of us are shame bearers more than we feel like i...

What Time Can't Do

  Genesis 27:41-45 Click here to listen to today’s devotional Time heals all wounds. At least, that's what we're told. But does it? In the book of Genesis, Jacob steals his older brother Esau's blessing. Siblings know how frustrating it can be when a brother or sister messes with their things. Well, this was much more than that. Esau's rage builds, and he vows to kill his brother. The boys' mother, Rebekah, orchestrated this whole scenario. And when she hears what Esau plans to do, she tells Jacob to run away to an uncle for a while. A literal translation of the text could be to tarry for a few days. Rebekah assumes Esau's fury and anger will cool down in a few days. It almost sounds reasonable to give him time to cool his temper. Except Jacob doesn't stay away for a few days. He stays away for about twenty years. And as far as Genesis tells us, Rebekah never sees her son again. Sometimes, we assume time will do the work that only truth, repentance, forgiven...

More WWJD?

  Honestly, WWJD always felt corny to me. But the older I get, the more I pastor, the more I see people on social media, and the more I watch how we talk to and about each other, the more I wish we would reconsider WWJD. Not as slogan faith, of course, but as a way to slow down and think about the world we are creating. What if you're more responsible for this world being the way it is than you admit? WWJP? What would Jesus post? We are so sure our reactions are so righteous. Would Jesus post to win a pointless online debate, or to share the kingdom of God? WWJSAOP? Would would Jesus say about other people? Or, more striking, what would he say about what we say about other people? How many times did Jesus try to humiliate other people? Oh, he exposed hypocrisy, but it was usually aimed at those who protected power at others' expense. And there was always an invitation tucked in there. WWJJA? What would Jesus joke about? Jesus is not humorless. But he never laughed at vulnerabl...

Bad company

  1 Corinthians 15:29-34 Listen to today's devotional When we hear bad company, most of us picture people like friends, coworkers, or certain relationships that pull us in the wrong direction. And yes, that can be what Paul meant in 1 Corinthians 15. But I'll add that the bad-company warning should go deeper than who you sit next to. It reaches into what you let speak to you. In that sense, bad company isn’t just people you know. It’s the voices, narratives, and assumptions you allow to influence your thinking. It’s the constant drip of cynicism that says hope is naïve. It’s the outrage cycle that trains us to see enemies before neighbors. And it’s the quiet lie that says God may be loving, but not really trustworthy, or God is present, but not so much powerful. Consider this. We don’t become what we believe overnight. We become what we listen to repeatedly. Paul writes this to a church wrestling with false ideas about resurrection and hope. The danger wasn’t only immoral behav...

5-7 relationships every year?

My assumption is this quote relates to relationships we form in our churches. Personally, 2-3 people is a high number, but the point stands. And 2-3 people is still significant. This is one of those things they don't prepare you for. I'm not sure how you can prepare for it. As long as someone says they consider my local congregation their church, I pray for them on a regular basis and do my best to stay connected. When people move on, especially when there's no communication, it hurts. Pastors, I’ve seen this stat a lot. Is this true for you? pic.twitter.com/Y9H9G7dAaR — Luke Simmons (@lukedsimmons) May 30, 2025 Stay blessed...john

OVerbearing

  Obadiah 1-9 Based on its etymology, you can say part of what it means to be arrogant is to be overbearing. An arrogant person can overwhelm others with their haughty attitudes and self aggrandizing. It can be much to listen to someone go on and on about how good they are, especially in relation to other people. To add injury to insult, arrogant people may rely on their lowly opinions of others to excuse or dismiss inappropriate behavior. It's easy to mock someone you already think less of. Spend your time thinking too much of yourself and you're bound to belittle the people around you. One word to associate with the message of the book of Obadiah is arrogance. Edom had been arrogant in their relation to Israel (even God). Edom refused to help Israel in their desert wandering (Numbers 20). One could, perhaps, chalk that up to sibling and tribal rivalry. But Obadiah's vision also includes other reminders. Edom joined Israel's enemies and even "gloated" over Is...

Questions on divorce

  1 Corinthians 7:10-16 I preach with a twofold goal I don't know I always fulfill. First, I want to inform, instruct and encourage. A listener shouldn't have to figure out what I'm talking about. There needs to be a clarity to what I say. But, secondly, I want you to leave a sermon wondering what else I meant. In a way, I want to point you towards more questions than certainty. Clarity and mystery should meet so that a message is more than a presentation or TED talk. That's how I leave reading Paul's instructions on married life in 1 Corinthians. On one hand, there are straight forward thoughts. Don't divorce, mainly. Scripture doesn't promote or celebrate divorce. Still, there are exceptions where divorce is acceptable. It's helpful to recognize Paul is addressing specific questions asked of him. And his responses may or may not be most helpful in all situations for us today. He's also aware of particular ideas circulating through the church. Some ...

Encouraging characters

  Esther 4 Esther makes a sudden entrance into the story that bears her name. The king had banished his queen, "never again" to enter his presence (Esther 1:19). That led to a search for her replacement. And Esther's name appears matter-of-factly in chapter 2. Hers is the only name given of all the women who endured the king's twelve-month beauty contest. Once she's selected as the next queen, her name takes a chapter off. But the story begins to brew. We learn of Haman's great desire to annihilate the Jewish people. Esther reappears in distress of the news and it's now we get a sense of something important. The new queen didn't know her place. No, she didn't have full access to the king. There were rules, after all. Just ask the replaced queen, if you can find her. Plus, tt had been a month since the king has summoned Esther. But we can't say Esther was a nobody. She's the queen. Still, it's almost like she doesn't sense what that ...

Make great relationships

  Ecclesiastes 4:9-16 Jesus' disciples once argued with one another about which of them was the greatest. That was a pretty dumb argument to have considering what Jesus had just taught them. His lesson on suffering, death and resurrection went right over them. Jesus the rabbi went on to teach them how to overcome their desire to be so great. The preacher of Ecclesiastes might've offered a different response. He would've reminded them how the  greatest  is a fleeting position. Let's say one of the disciples won that argument. He reasoned well enough with the others and collected enough votes. Even if they weren't happy about it, the group decided he was the greatest. It wouldn't be long before the others changed their minds. Now, nothing about the greatest disciple changed. It's the others who change. They can't help it. We can't help it. And so, whether it's warranted or not, in time, someone considered great today will become less-than-great. Li...

Can't we all just disagree?

 It's quite nice to have a thoughtful, meaningful conversation with someone you disagree with. The problem is those kinds of conversations don't always happen. They don't happen nearly enough. As nice as those conversations are, they aren't something a lot of us can pull off. Or care to. I'm convinced it's a sickliness.   If we can't disagree without insulting one another, don't we risk our compassion? Why does someone disagreeing with us upset us so much? And doesn't that anger often turn into resentment? Then what? Name calling and derogatory remarks only deepen our separation.   Differing opinions could be a feature to our relationships. They don't have to be a detriment.   Someone in an online group was preparing for an upcoming Bible study. The study featured the teaching of a respected Bible teacher. Excitement and worry filled the study leader because of one lesson in particular. Actually, one opinion. In the lesson, the Bible teacher shar...